Damba cinta mu

Raihan - Damba cintamu


Tuhanku ampunkanlah segala dosaku
Tuhanku maafkanlah kejahilan hambaMu
Ku sering melanggar laranganMu
Dalam sedar ataupun tidak
Ku sering meninggalkan suruhanMu
Walau sedar aku milikMu

Bilakah diri ini 'kan kembali
Kepada fitrah sebenar
Pagi kuingat petang kualpa
Begitulah silih berganti
Oh Tuhanku,Kau pimpinlah diri ini
Yang mendamba CintaMu
Aku lemah aku jahil
Tanpa pimpinan dariMu
Ku sering berjanji di depanMu
Sering jua ku memungkiri
Ku pernah menangis keranaMu
Kemudian ketawa semula

Kau pengasih
Kau penyayang
Kau pengampun
Kepada hamba-hambaMu
Selangkah ku kepadaMu
Seribu langkah Kau padaku
Tuhan,Diri ini tidak layak ke surgaMu
Tapi tidak pula aku sanggup ke nerakaMu

Kutakut kepadaMu
Ku mengharap jua padaMu
Mogaku 'kan selamat dunia akhirat
Seperti rasul dan sahabat
Seperti rasul dan sahabat

This song describes perfectly what I'm feeling....

Not good enough....

I always have this problem. Whenever I got the "uzur" (pms) I always take that as a "holiday" and I neglect my hifz. I am a person that cannot take any break. I need to istiqamah all the way both old and new surahs. I realised that if I stop, its hard to get back on track.

I had visited the cemetery recently. But this hard as rock heart do not feel anything. Either I was numb thinking about worldly affairs or I'm really a goner. I had lost my way....

I need to recite the Quran again. Actually I can read those Surahs that I fear I will forget during "uzur" but I rather not to, I dunno why.

I cannot follow my heart...there is a malay saying "kalau ikut hati, mati"..if u follow ur heart, u will die...the truth has spoken.

I need to muhasabah diri and think hard about the "sins" commited that cause this heart to have a "plague" like the teeth. Need to scrape it off. Need my Quran.

I think I need to thinkback why I chose this path , why I love Hifz, why I wanted to be ahuffaz..I need to re-think and evaluate my goals and aspirations again. I need to watch "the mesage" video again to bring back those hot tears and to reminisces the hard path that the Prophet (pbuh) had to go thru to bring Islam and Al-Quran to us...

yeah indeed I need to do that...

Ok, its HARD work but I can do it!!

Stucked at Ar-Rahmaan.

Had not been in class due to very busy schedule. So tired to go to class, the mind is exhausted.

But that should not be an excuse. I still remember Ustaz told me that he believes I can khatam my hifz. With such conviction and confidence he said..I must prove him right! Insya-Allah amin.

Stucked at Ar-Rahmaan and as-sajdah then its test time. I need to set a goal for this year. Time is running out soon. I need to get back on my feet to those glory days , i need to be motivated. Push everything aside for a moment and persevere! I know I can do it! And I will!

I need this!

I dunno what to do...

I admit, I felt so GUILTY. I was too engrossed with my work that I neglect something precious dearest to my heart...my best friend the Holy Quran.

I wanna cry but I can't
I wanna shout at the top of my voice "HELP" but I can't

I just can doa in my heart with all my sincerity that God help me
Help me in opening the right path for me again
a better way for my heart to allow Al-Quran back into my life

What has happen to me?

Why did I allow such tragedy to happen?

Why am I so engrossed in chasing worldly gains?

I dunno....

I had been invited time and again to embraced Hifz and yet I did not treasure that invitation and cherish the time I had on earth.

What is wrong with me? I dunno

I am at loss..
I need to get back on my feet.

Stop, look and listen.
Listen to my heart and Al-Quran.
Read those hadiths and understand them by heart
Practise it!

I know i can do it!
I am and I will conquer this hurdle.
Because I know i am the BEST!
Insya-Allah.

Tiada gunanya...

Hati membatu keras
Tidak mahu dengar maupun membaca

Hati ku keras seperti permata
tiada mampu menembusi

Hati ku keras seperti besi
tiada yang dapat melembutkannya

Hati ku...
Oh hatiku, mengapa engkau berdegil sekali

Kenapa engkau engkar?
Kenapa? Kenapa?

Dunia penuh muslihat
Dunia permainan sementara

Tidak mahukah engkau kepada yang hakiki?
Yang kekal selamanya
yang tinggi ,cantik,suci
Jannatul Firdausi?

Subhanallah
Ya Allah lunturkan kekerasan hatiku ini dengan bacaan Al-Quran.
Lembutkan hatiku dengan tangisan mendengar Al-Quran.
Lembutkan hatiku ini untuk menghafal Al-Quran....
Amin.

Why the heavy heart?

Why does my heart felt heavy all of a sudden?

Is it because I had left
something valuable behind?
Is it because I had left
My soulmate behind?
Is it because I had left
and not looked back...

Why,why,why the sudden change?
Why did I ignore ?
Why did I left it stranded?
Why did I let it untouched?

Dunia is just temporary
The heart has been misled with the symphony

I'm stranded
With a heavy heart
Misled by so many attractions

Need to get a hold
Need to get a grip
Need to get back to reality

Reality of life on dunia and hereafter

Got to get back
Got to get my motivations
Got to return to my friend, my best friend dunia akhirat
............................... the Holy Quran.